I am not sorry.

I am not sorry

for speaking my mind.

I am not sorry

for expressing my feelings.

I am not sorry.

Sometimes people will not like what you have to say.  They will expect you to stay silent, or even worse – they will expect you to agree with every word that they speak.  They will not expect you to have an opinion or to voice your frustration, even when you are trying to better the situation.  Even if you are soft spoken and calm.  Sometimes people will be offended that you dare to call them out on their behavior or disagree with their opinion.  And if they do not like what you have to say, they may be mean, shut you down, or freeze you out with the coldest shoulder you’ve ever know.  They may be stubborn, waiting for you to repent.

But my love, do not apologize!

If they are too petty to listen, then they do not deserve to hear what you have to say.

They are not worth your breath.

Do not apologize, my love.

For you have done nothing wrong.

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New Years Resolutions.

Who is ready to bury 2017 six hundred feet deep?? 

I think I may be an outlier in saying that this year has actually brought a lot of good into my life!  Although the events in the outside world made me want to cry regularly, my personal life felt rejuvenated and mature. The women in my life continue to amaze me and have become the strong support base that is my inner circle. I am in love with a man who has never made me feel alone or unworthy.  My needs are met and my heart is happy.

That being said, there is always room to grow.  Which is why I love the tradition of setting intentions for the new year. So call me cliché but Ima do it anyways!

  1. Pause.  Oh, how the world could use more of this!  Personally, this resolution is needed through each and every layer of the onion that is my life.  The outer most layer may be silly and surface level, but nonetheless it feels important – I really need to start proof reading my texts (and apparently blog posts) before I send or post them, you guys.  Lord knows how many times I’ve either spelled something wrong, let auto correct get the best of me, or straight up put my foot in my mouth by saying something the wrong way.  Speed fingers never do you good! So I am setting an intention to slow down. I am trying not to rush, but instead to pause during the day, the week, the year.  This may be through meditation, yoga, or simply taking a moment to breathe and think through an action before jumping in face first.

  2. Run.  Point Blank Period.  Running has always been a way for me to clear my head and feel good about my body.  After losing momentum this holiday season and remaining stagnant for too long, I am ready to get accountable and start training again!  This involves finding a gym with less excuses.  I currently pay way too much for a gym that is too far away, only to avoid people I don’t want to see and ultimately end up never making it to the gym. The easy answer is a new start.  A new gym that is closer without unsavory acquaintances with whom I am constantly trying to avoid eye contact. But I know it will take more than just a location change to jump-start my motivation. A training schedule is a wonderful way to initiate a plan of action.  The next challenge is sticking with it!

  3. Mint. The financial hangover from Christmas seems to hit harder every year.  When I was a poor college student, I found Mint to be a life saving resource when it comes to budgeting and managing what little money I had.  Every year I say I am going to save more, spend less, but really I should aim to be less impulsive.  This goes back to my original resolution to pause and think about my purchases.  Because more often than not, the answer is no, I don’t really need to buy those $40 comfy pants when I already have a dozen at home.

RIP 2017!  In your coffin I leave my laziness, regret, and impulsive behavior.

Good Night. Good Bye. Good Riddance.

 

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